I saw that the photo i just posted got a lot of notes, and people asked if it was Justin and I. I clicked on a blog, seeing it´s name was viccyandjustin. Curiously I went to it and noticed it was a blog dedicated to, well, mine and justins relationship. I smiled, biting my lip. That was really cute. I clicked on follow and scrolled down her blog, seeing photos of us together, and singles of justin and i.
At the Ellen show, things were going good. I got an warm welcoming, an overwhelming one actually. She had gone over the basic stuff. I told her I was doing good and that life was better now than before, and I told her that I have been travelling for two years with my brother.
"so you went travelling for two years?" Ellen asked, i nodded, "what about the other year?" She added,
"I´ve lived in North Carolina" I smiled, "I have an appartment there" I added.
"you were there for a whoe year? what did you do?" She asked, looking curious.
"Well, i have always had this dream to own a coffee shop, so i opened one and did that for a year" I laughed lightly.
"so you worked at your own café?" she clarified and i nodded. Ellen looked taken back, ,"thats something I´ve never heard before" She said,making me laugh. "how did you manage not to get recognized?" She asked,
"It was a small town" I shrugged, not going too much into it.
"okay, so now we have the answers to where you have been" Ellen said, "and now what im really wondering, is why you left? what made you leave?" She asked and i noticed how quiet it got around me,
"first i have to say that my fans has nothing to do with this. I owe them everything and i love them so much, and me leaving was never because of them or anything like that" i clarified.
"It will probably sound strange, and some will most likely call me ungrateful after this" I said. " But, growing up in the spotlight like i did,I never really got to have a say in..how i was supposed to be like. So in a way, the person i was, was build by everyone else, in a way" I grimazed, trying to find the words to explain. "dont get me wrong or anything! i was really happy with who i was, who i am" I said, scared of what they will think. "So at one side i was living my dream, doing what i love, and on the other, i was struggeling to find my voice. I was 15, turing 16, and as everyone else at that age, i start to question things about myself and who i am, and it left me wondering" I continued, "I wasnt getting tired of acting, performing or anything, but i was getting tired of not being..me, i guess. I sort of felt like a picture without a face" I said.
"so you were having a hard time being who everyone else wanted you to be, and who were thought you were?" Ellen asked,
"in a way, yes. Like, the person i was before i left, it was me, but at the same time it wasnt. As i got older i realized that what some of the people i worked with wanted me to be like, i couldnt. They wanted me to be like this, picture perfect girl who had everything, and that was hard, specially when im not perfect. And as i realized this, it began this..Who am i, thingy" i talked with my hands alot. Its weird, i had all my answers ready before the show, but now i cant remember any of them.
"you know, I´ve looked around, and i dont think there is a day of your life that isnt documented" Ellen pointed out, and the audience looked suprised.
I gave a laugh, "yeah, something like that. I didnt know what a private life was until i left" I said honestly, "i actually have secrets now" I chuckled.
"you didnt have one before?"
"no, well, i didnt know how to separate my private life with my public life, i kind of didnt know the difference" I explained.
"so leaving, was for you the best option?" She asked.
"yeah, i think so. I´ve learned so much, not only about myself, but about others, the world and so many things. I know who i am now, and i know not to let anyone change it" I smiled and the audience clapped for me.
"thats good to hear, Viccy" Ellen nodded, making me laugh.
"so how did you keep yourself updated while you were gone?" ellen asked, and i knew that now we were done with the serious stuff, thank god.
"uh, i didnt" i laughed awkwardly. Ellen frowned at me,
"what?" She asked, looking overdramticly shocked.
"yeah, i kept away from all the gossip and rumours and stuff" I shrugged. "i was still on twitter, just not tweeting" I added, "but i didnt pay any attention to any of the gossip stuff" I said.
"wow" Ellen said suprised, "so for three years you have been missing out on a lot of stuff then" She said,
"i guess. Like, i know the good things, but i didnt pay attention to the gossp and rumours" I explained.
"i can give you an update then. what do you think of mileys hair?" She asked and i laughed,
"what? Her hair is beautiful" I said, not getting why she asked,
"she cut it" Ellen said and my brows raised,
"isnt it normal to cut your hair?" I asked and some laughed,
"sure, but she really cut it. Like Ellen-short cut it" She said.
"really? i havent seen that!" I said. Miley have such pretty hair. A picture of her with blonde, short hair came up,
"no way, it looks so good!" I exclaimed, "I remember she told me once she wanted short hair!" I said, still looking at it. "It fits her" I grinned.
"she has gotten a lot of comments on it though" Ellen said.
"I dont get that, its just hair, hair on her head, not everyone elses. Why is that such a big deal?" I rolled my eyes. The media should focus more on real problems, not hair.
"I agree with you totatlly. Anyways, what about Kim K? shes pregnant" Ellen said and a picture of Kim came up.
"what! With who?!" I asked, shocked. My eyes were wide, and i probably looked stupid because they laughed at me,
"Kanye West" Ellen said
I gasped, "they´re dating?! since when?!" I said, my mouth now open. how come i didnt know this stuff?!
" a while now" Ellen shrugged, looking carefree.
"oh my god. What else have I missed? Next youre gonna tell me is that there will be another movie for Finding Nemo?"I joked, knowing that a sequel is coming, since Ellen is looking forward to it. They laughed,
"Oh thank god you knew that" ellen said, "if you didnt i would have felt sorry for you" She sighed.
" What else is new.., Justin bieber just released his new album" Ellen said casually,
"yeah, i have it on my Ipod. Its amazing" I said just as casual as Ellen did.
"I know right" She grinned.
"I asked the views to send in quesitons to you, and i picked out a few" Ellen told me and i nodded, "sounds cool"I said with an easy grin,
"Bella from Idaho asks; you´ve changed so much in your looks! what happened? By the way, you look good!" Ellen said. I laughed,
"uh..puberty, i guess?" I said awkwardly, making them laugh, "thank, by the way" I smiled,
"Tom, from Alaska asks; Who is your celeberty crush?" She read out loud,
"Ryan Gosling" I said right away without hesitation. Ellen raised her brows at me,
"you sure? you seemed a bit hesitant" She joked. I laughed and flushed.
"Mia from Florida asks; who´s your least favorite person?" She said and i frowned, "am i even aloud to answer that?" I asked, making them laugh.
"okay, i wont put a spotlight on one single person, but i dont like people who dont believe in that everyones equal" I said. Ellen looked curious, "like gay marriage and rights, for example" I said.
"well, i agree with you totally" Ellen said while nodding. I chuckled,
"we should just love everybody and jugde them by what car they drive, not over who they love" I said and the audience laughed and applaused me for my words. I just dont understand it at all, why care if someone loves someone with the same sex as them? It doesnt make a difference for you at all.
"That is the best thing ive heard in a while" ellen smiled.
"alright, Siri from Canada asks, Whats your favorite clothing that you own?" I bit my lip and thought about it, then laughed,
"I have this shirt that says; Im sorry its just that i literally do not care at all. I love that shirt" I said smiling wide. Ellen laughed along with the others.
"Eric from California asks, how is your social life going?" Ellen said
"Im too lazy to have a social life" I said, shrugging my shoulder.
" Brian from Missouri asks, Will there be any new things coming from you any time soon?" ellen read.
"uh, no" I winced, "probably not in a while" I said.
"why not?" Ellen asked me,
"well, i didnt want it to be like..Im back everyone! put me in every movie, make a new album, put me in every interview, put me everywhere!" I made my voice weird, "I dont want that" I said, my voice normal again. "We can see it like this is a relationship, we´re taking it slooow" I grinned, moving my hand in a slow motion thing. They laughed at me.
She asked a few more questions, then we somehow ended up talking about my lunch date with my mom,
"okay so we were driving back home, and one of my favorite songs came on the radio and I was like, Mom turn it up I love this song! and she was like, but you have heard it a million times before, and then i was like, but its on the radio and mom just, So? , and i just, IT´S ON THE RADIO!" I said and the audience laughed.
"do you believe in soulmates?" Ellen asked me, folding her hands again.
"I think they exist, just not always romantically" I said, " I think there are certain people you will meet in your life who you just connect with more than anyone else and you just understand each other perfectly" I said after thinking for a few seconds.
"thats really interesting" Ellen said, "but do you know whats even more interesting?" She asked.
"uhm..no?" I said. Ellen nodded towards the screen, "this" She said and this picture came up.
I looked down in my lap for some seconds, smiling to myself. I was most probably blushing by now.The audience wolfwhistled and clapped.
"I think i had a heartattact when i saw you two at the carpet" Ellen said and I heard the audience agreed. "I mean, I was just walking around you know, and suddently i heard, "VICTORIA JUSTIN" everywhere.and i was like, whaaat" She said making me laugh lightly, "I mean, it was so random. Justin had been away for some months for his album and stuff, and you had been away for years, and suddently out of nowhere, the two of you show up together at the AMAs, just like that" She said like she still couldnt believe it. I laughed through closed mouth.
"I was so shocked, i think im still in shock"She shook her head, "both of you had been away from a while and you just show up" she said.
"yeah i guess it was a bit..random.."I trailed off.
"i just, how, how did you even meet?!" She exclaimed.I chuckled,
"uh well, he worked in the same town as i did" I said and left it with that.
"that is so random" She said still finding it hard to believe,
"you two look amazin together though, and im guessing that you two have been together for a while" She said, "and i just cant get over how cute you two are" She said and this picture came up,
The audience screamed. Justin was shirtless in the picture, go figure.
I laughed embarressed,
"I chose this picture because he was shirtless" Ellen said seriously, "the fact that you two looked cute was just a coincidence" She shrugged making me laugh.
"He is your first boyfriend right?" Ellen asked, making me blush,
"uhm yeah" I said awkwardly, "It was so weird. i was so nervous! In the beginning i was like, am i even ready for this i have no idea what to do, i mean, how often does he have to be fed, do i need to walk him or?" I said with wide eyes. I said it seriously but it was ment as a joke so i hope no one thinks that this actually happened. They all laughed a lot though.
Ellen laughed too, " i can give you advice any time. just text me or something" She said with a easy grin,
"thanks ellen, ill remember that" I laughed.
"So how are you dealing with everything? I mean, there has been a lot of comments on both you being back and dating bieber" she said
"what other people think of me is non of my business" I said with a light shrug.
Ellen stared at me like she didnt believe that i just said those words. " wow" She ended up saying, "so you dont care?" She asked
"well ofcourse i care, i mean, i care what my fans think of me, and my family and friends, because they all matter to me. They mean everything to me and i want to be my best for them" I said honestly. There will always be haters and no one can change that, but the thing is, they dont matter.
"yeah, because there will always be hate, but the important thing is to focus on the ones who matters" ellen smiled and i nodded,
"alright well, we´re sadly running out of time, so Victoria, thank you so much for coming, its a pleasure to see you again and i wish only the best for your years to come, and im happy for you and justin" ellen said,
"thank you so much" I smiled honestly,
"at the end I´ll show you this picture of the new couple just because it is adorable" Ellen said,
"you were great, im proud honey" my mom smiled and pulled me into a hug backstage of Ellen Show. I chuckled, "thanks mom" I smiled. I changed back to my other clothes so i wouldnt have to wear the dress, because honestly, i feel uncomfortable wearing dresses. When i got back, Ellen was there, "the interview was great" She smiled, "you´ve really grown a lot Victoria, thats obvious and i must say i feel proud of you" She said and i beamed, "thank you, Ellen. It really means a lot" I said really meaning it, "i think these last years have been good for you, and i really think these next ones will be even better. You will have to come back here when you come out with something new though!" She said sternly. I laughed, "promise" I grinned. "okay, i have to get back, but thank you again and next time you see bieber, tell him im mad at him for not telling me about the two of you!"She said as she walked. I laughed, " I will!" I laughed.
The security informed me that there was fans waiting outside behind security fences, so i asked if i could see them before we left, which i could. I stepped outside while my mom got into the car, and a guard was behind me. I heard them scream from the inside, but once i got out it got louder. I laughed once i saw them, "hi!" I grinned and walked over to one of the ends and started to sign and take picture. This is a part iv missed a lot, meeting my fans and see them happy. "how are you guys?" I asked loud and heard lots of answer at the same time. I just grinned, "thats good" I smiled, taking a picture.
"Victoria, we have to go. Its starting to come more" The security informed me. I nodded, taking a step back and waved, "bye, i love you!" I said and blew them a kiss as I followed the guard to the car. One inside, i took out my phone, seeing a text from Justin. - I saw the interview, you were great! you looked hot in that yellow dress ;) proud of you baby. A simple text, but it made me smile so damn wide. My mom saw this and rolled her eyes at me while smiling, probably guessing who i was texting. I texted him back and placed my phone back in my pocket, starting to talk to my mom instead.